Tick...Tock...Tick...Tock...

You see that little ticker to the right, you know the one with the baby floating in it that tells you how far along I am in my pregnancy?  Well right now it says, "11 weeks 2 days."  I can't help but stare at it and say to myself, "really?"  I still don't look pregnant but in my mind I feel like I've been pregnant for the last 6 months or something.  Time is drifting by so very slowly and I can't help but think about all those people who told me that the second pregnancy would go by so much faster than the first.  And to all those people I say:  you are bloody stinkin' LIARS!!!!  You got my hopes up only to have my dreams shattered.  I feel like this will never end.  No I'm not sick and I haven't had any signs of morning sickness so maybe I have little to complain about but I am really really really tired of this semi-constant state of hunger in which I am always finding myself in these days.  I am sick of this feeling of exhaustion which oddly has nothing to do with sleep but is more of a feeling of being zapped of all energy - lethargic is the word!

I try to uplift myself by going back into my blog archive and reminding myself that I wrote a post very similar to the one I'm writing at this very moment last time around, but it does little to comfort me.  I dunno, I guess part of me at least wants to have something to show for all these feelings I'm feeling.  Like a round belly to remind me that there's someone growing in there.  Or to feel those cute little kicks and nudges of the little one saying, "hi mommy."  But so far, nothing.  I haven't even outgrown any of my clothes yet, though I can tell it is coming, especially after dinner.  Oh well, complaining doesn't do any good but it sure does feel good to rant a little.  By the way, I'm adding a poll to the blog now.  Tell me what you think:  boy or girl?

"No News is Good News." Really?

So who says, "No news is good news?" Because I'm not really agreeing with it at this point. My mom said that this will increase my patience, well so far it hasn't. I guess, in some ways I am making progress. I'm sure that she's dropped, I've lost my mucus plug, and I can definitely feel more tightening going on now, but still no cigar. I suppose I want her to come so badly without induction that maybe my level of impatience has increased. I guess 5 days isn't really that long though. Honestly I think I'm sick of the long nights, all the trips to the bathroom, the lack of energy, etc. Oh well, I think it's nap time, so I'm gonna keep this short. I'll try to keep you all updated!

D-20: Let the Countdown Begin!

So you know how kids love to ask the question, "are we there yet?" well I have been asking myself a similar question as of late, "is it over yet?" I know I shouldn't complain because my first 35 weeks were wwwwwaaaayyyyy too easy from what I have heard of other peoples pregnancies. But honestly, I just want it to be over with! The heartburn (which I always seem to have) the headaches, the horrible sleep, the kicks I get in my ribs, etc...they are all starting to wear me down.

So that's all the complaining that I will do...in this post, anyway. As for other news, everything still looks good! Today at my Dr appointment my blood pressure was the best it's ever been, at least while at the Dr office, it was 108/73. The doctor's really happy with that number and sometimes I think to myself that had it been higher maybe, just maybe, he would decide to induce me to avoid the risk of it increasing. But 108/73 is definitely not a number he is concerned about. During today's ultrasound he commented on how "high up" she is and I laughed and told him that my ribs could have told him that. Then I asked him if that meant that she was really long or just that she hadn't dropped yet, his only reply was to say that it could mean many things. I love the way he gives me his sarcastic answers. Which reminds me of a story that B loves: Last month B ended up having a day off on the day that I went to the Dr so he got to go with me. Well there was a patient talking to Dr in the hallway asking very nonchalantly if her baby was big or not. And the Dr. says, "yes, it's monstrous." B found this hilarious and still gets a huge laugh out of it. So yeah, he's not the type to give serious answers (unless there's something to worry about). So next week I have my final "detailed" ultrasound which he will check on her growth. I emphasize detailed because the ultrasounds that I have on a weekly basis now aren't really detailed and only used for checking my amniotic fluid. I will also have another NST and he'll check my cervix again...hopefully it's more than ½cm by that point. I told him that I'm ready any time with the exception of next Tuesday, which is my birthday, and call me selfish but I really don't wanna share my birthday! So until I have more to add...see ya later.

One Month!

Exactly one month from today our baby is due. Saying that is a bit surreal, I mean we found out relatively early on that we were expecting, right around 4 weeks. And to be frank, finding out that early probably made this whole process seem that much longer and that much more stressful. Anyway, all that aside, things have worked out great thus far and we couldn't' be more thankful for that. Now that we're in the final month, the final few weeks and everything is ready and awaiting her arrival I find myself more and more anxious. She could be here anytime within these next few weeks and knowing that I'll be a mommy to such a precious gift is a bit overwhelming at times. But at the same time, I'm ready for her to be out of me and in our arms!

Patience & Temptation

*Sigh*

Okay, so I'm really excited about being a mom and being pregnant and all that stuff, but I am really really getting impatient. There are several reasons for my impatience though. First is just sheer curiosity: what will she look like, what will be her temperament, what will her personality be like, and other things like that. Another reason that I find myself growing impatient is just because of this diet that I am following. Now don't get me wrong, for the most part it's fairly easy to follow. It's less about what I can/can't have and more about the amounts that I can/can't have. So mostly it's not a big deal, plus I'm pregnant and down 7 pounds (who's ever heard of such a thing!) so trust me I'm not complaining. But sometimes my emotions kick in and I just get extremely upset about little things, like yesterday I was in the middle of the grocery store and I was really upset (to the point of crying) that I can't have apple juice. So, it's not the cake and brownies that I miss, it's apple juice, orange juice and more than anything...Welch's Grape Juice!!! More than all of my sugar-filled desires I want a healthy and happy (and less than 16 pound) baby, so I will continue to fight off all these temptations. For the next 10.5 weeks (give or take) but let there be no doubt after she's born I want apple, orange and grape juice for a week!!! The things we do for love!!!

*Sigh*

It's a miracle; I actually have some free time to post to the blog. It really is amazing! So I guess now that I have time to write that I should come up with something to write. This week started off on the rough side, I can definitely say that the pregnancy emotions are starting to kick in. But thanks to great friends and great family members I was able to get over the hump. I'm still rather impatient with this whole pregnancy process but being so busy has helped me put my mind on other things. It's kinda weird the things that pregnancy changes, it's not just about the changes to your body but I am also having mental and spiritual changes. I find myself always wanting to improve, always wanting to be better and honestly it has very little to do with me and more to do with the unborn child that I already love so much. I want to live better so that I can be a better example. I want to learn more so that I can teach more. It is absolutely amazing the things that you think about when you're pregnant! Sometimes I feel unworthy, unworthy of the unconditional love that my child will have for me, unworthy of raising one of God's most amazing creations and unworthy of this beautiful blessing that's growing inside me right this very minute. But even with all those feelings and emotions, I wouldn't change my life right now for all the money in the world. My life's not perfect but I couldn't ask for a more supportive husband, family or friends because I am so truly blessed by them all and I can't wait for my baby to be a part of it. I'm under no delusions that this whole process of having a baby and raising a child will be easy but I know that I have such a strong support group of people that are willing and anxious to help that I can't help but be excited about the whole thing. I must be one of the, if the THE, luckiest girl in the world! 143

Eight Weeks Three Days!!!

Okay, so if you didn't already know, I am the most impatient person that you will ever meet!!!! I am 8wks 3 days as of right now and it seems like the next 31-32 weeks are going to take forever to get here. Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying experiencing the whole pregnancy thing (probably because I'm still symptom-less) but I can't believe I have to wait until September. I am one of those people who doesn't want to wait for anything, but in this instance I have no control, and frankly I don't know how I feel about it. I know I shouldn't rush things because in the end all that I really want is a healthy, happy baby but knowing that and saying that really doesn't do much to increase the amount of patience that I have. I guess I'll be slightly more content when we find out the gender of the baby because then I can start buying stuff, and honestly nothing makes me more happy and content than shopping!

On a different note I thought I'd share some completely random information with you, so enjoy. The only cravings that I have really had have been for fruit and green beans mostly although broccoli is really yummy right now too (well yummier than normally). I've always enjoyed sleeping but I think I enjoy it even more so now than before. Cigarette smoke is even more appalling than before, in fact when I smell it that is about the only time I feel nauseas. I have a heightened since of smell and the guy who sits next to me in one of my classes has horrible breath. I really can't wait until I have a really big belly because I wanna laugh at Brandon having to cut my toe nails, just the thought of it makes me laugh. Although, I will inform him that if he doesn't want to do it, he doesn't have to...I'll just go pay $30 for a pedicure every time I need one...I think that will convince him. B is so cute, whenever I don't want to eat or he doesn't feel like I've eaten enough he'll say, "But what about the baby?" He also always says goodnight to the baby before going to sleep each night. We have a name picked out for a girl and half of a name for a boy. For a girl, her name will be I. J. Fox for a boy it'll be Elian _______ Fox, (we can't agree on a middle name) all that we can really agree on is that we want it to be a Hispanic name. In fact I think I'll add a new poll to the site for you all to vote on, I'll include the middle names that I like and see which of those you all like the best. I think I'll do that now, so let us know what you think! Oh and if you have any suggestions feel free to leave them in the comment section, but chances are if it's not a Hispanic name, we probably won't use it. Although the name Andreas isn't Hispanic, it's more European, so who knows...just take the poll and leave whatever suggestions you have. 143