Whew!!

Over the past several weeks I've been pretty stressed, and all because of a bet that I lost! Before I get into all that I'll tell you that I love breastfeeding! But not having a period made me love it even more! However, not having a period has been both a blessing and a curse for me because I can get really paranoid that I'm pregnant. The fact is that I could totally be pregnant and have no clue because as many of you know, during our last pregnancy I had no symptoms at all. And the mini pill is not the most reliable form of contraception but it's a necessity for me in order to breastfeed. I am sad to admit that last month, 8 months after Y's birth, Aunt Flow reared her ugly head again. And with that said, I'll start the story now:

Ya see, I made a bet with B and I lost the bet and I won't say exactly what the bet was but I will say that I lost the bet during the time I was ovulating. This combined with the notion that slightly a week after said bet, I start to see a blood tinged discharge (my period was not due as I had already had it a couple weeks prior). My initial thought was that it was implantation bleeding, as I did more reading, the more paranoid I got; thinking for sure we were pregnant. My mind was consumed with the idea of having an 18 month old and a newborn, I seriously wanted to cry. I know it wouldn't be the end of the world and I know I could handle it if I had to but still the whole idea was enough to scare the living daylights outta me (does anyone say that anymore?).

I have a 31 day cycle and so a few days before Aunt Flow was due I took a pregnancy test and it said I wasn't pregnant...I wanted to throw a party. So I waited the few days for the dreaded visitor and she never came. I begin to panic thinking that the stupid test was wrong. Or maybe I took it too soon. But the box said it would tell me as early as five days before my missed period...I took it only three days before my missed period so it should have been accurate! I had a million thoughts running through my mind and seriously just wanted to run to the store and buy another test (I'm so paranoid that I try to keep them in the bathroom but I was all out this time). But I promised myself that I would wait a few more weeks and give it time until I was sure that I had enough hormones in my body that the test could not be wrong.

So on Monday, as we prepared to go to the zoo, I realized that Aunt Flow had just showed up!! I think in my head I was jumping up and down and singing. Needless to say, B was really relieved too! I hate when Aunt Flow comes, but this time I could not have been more excited to see her! It came a full week late, a full week which left me to agonize over the possibility. I had seriously already started thinking of how I could rearrange the furniture in Y's room and how I would paint the letter's of his/her name and how I would announce the news to everyone this time. I'm relieved to not be making an announcement right now, but look forward to making it in the not-so-near future. Don't get me wrong, we can't wait to have another baby (well maybe that's the wrong way to put it). We can wait to have another baby but we're excited to welcome him/her a little farther down the road...like middle-to-end of 2010.